FAN FAIL

Recently I met some fans of the blog which was great as I thought the only person that read this was my mum. And even SHE said I was “too over the top” and “a silly annoying little bitch” and “why don’t you get a boyfriend, like a real boyfriend, because you spend too much time with pens and no-one wants a dry shrivelled up old maid despite how many notepads and paperclips she owns” and “for fuck’s sake, get out of bed, look at you, you’re a mess, you’re a fucking mess” and “oh god, Josey, please, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean it, don’t do that Josey, please don’t do that, I won’t say it again, I love you, I love you.” Bless her.


One fan asked how Victor was getting on. “Victor?” I asked. “Yes, Victor,” he replied. “You know Victor Kiam, your Stationery Hunk of the Day.”


Now, guys. Guys.


If you’re going to read this blog, you need to stay ON TOP OF THE GAME.


The Stationery Hunk of the Day is Ian (Irwin) Helford, Chairman Emeritus of Viking Direct. He loves stationery more than he loves his own life and is extremely sexy.


Now, this Victor Kiam you refer to so nonchalantly, is the dude who loved Remington razors so much that he bought the company.




Don’t get me wrong, he’s cool and shit, BUT HE IS NOT A STATIONERY HUNK. He is not a stationery hunk.


Readers, I love you, but please check yourselves before you wreck yourselves.

Posted by Josey

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